19 Tips For Females In 2012
By 
- If his greatest attribute is “SWAG,” run in the opposite direction. (Don’t worry, there’s a 98% chance that his jeans will be sagging below his rear, so he’ll have no shot at catching you.)
- Either start approaching guys or stop complaining about the ones who approach you. Its 2012, there’s nothing wrong with adopting that Sadie Hawkins Dance mindset.
- Don’t base your opinions of the entire male population on the actions of a few knuckleheads.
- Just because a dude has a Nikon camera and is decent at Photoshop does not make him a photographer. And more importantly, posing for him doesn’t make you a model.
- Don’t take advice or listen to the hardships of being an independent, single woman from a rich musician (married to an even wealthier man)… I’m specifically referring to Beyoncé.
- It is completely OK to not watch sports. That’s a whole lot less irritating than putting sports related Tweets & Facebook statuses, just to be topical. Example: “Kobe and Lakers are my team, they are SOOOO good at basketball!”
- Don’t wear sweatpants in public. A recent study showed that the sight of sweatpants causes instant softness in the male penis.
- Do wear yoga pants in public. I don’t mean to sound shallow or chauvinistic but there’s literally an entire website dedicated to “Girls In Yoga Pants” so this phenomenon is global.
- We get it, you like Starbucks (and tanning in several cases).
- Stretch marks aren’t as significant as you think. I’ve never heard of a (half-decent) guy rejecting a girl he liked because of such a petty thing.
- Don’t “Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man.” Simply act and think like a lady and in due time, you’ll attract yourself a gentleman.
- It’s probably best to not send scandalous pictures to dudes that you barely know, since that rarely never ends well.
- If you base your expectations of men on Twilight, romantic comedies & Disney movie characters, please stop. Vampires, Matthew McConaughey and Princess Castles are farfetched to say the least. (Although there’s an abundance of guys out there who are very similar to Gaston from Disney’s Beauty and the Beast.)
- Rule of thumb: If he will miss an important game or cancel plans with his boys for you, he really cares.
- Not all social events need be turned into photo shoots. Don’t forget to actually experience things because you’re busy taking pictures.
- Eat a friggin’ hamburger if you want to! Curvy, healthy looking girls are far more attractive than skeletons.
- When a new Call Of Duty game comes out, expect and accept the neglecting that will follow for at least 48 hours.
- STOP hating on each other females so much. (Specifically when the hate is unwarranted and based strictly on physical appearance.)
- That Lifetime movie you’re about to watch, is about a woman with an abusive husband, an eating disorder, a stalker or an affair and in the end, she’ll be just fine. Boom! That should save you an abundance of time that would’ve otherwise been consumed by atrocious TV movies.
Read the article here!
The 7 things I took away from Easter Camp
I’m going to be honest, this is my first church camp since I was 13 and I have nothing to compare this camp with, but I thought it was amazing.
I had fun, got a little sunburnt, made new friends, got closer to my old ones and am closer to God than ever. Don’t know if it’s just me, but I enjoyed myself throughly even though it feels as though my eyeballs are going to explode. ..Need… Sleep…
And yes, I am still shaking sand out of unmentionable places. Like ears. And…
OK. Enough this nonsense, here’s the 7 things I learnt.
1) Respect the ocean
If you don’t respect it, you could do something silly like… Lose your keys… Lose your glasses… But mostly what was lost that day was dignity. *sigh* I felt my dignity being swept away along with the immense amount of seaweed every time Sargent Jovan forced us to take a roll along the shore and wait for the salt water to crash over us. “WHAT IS MY NAME?” He yelled.
“JOVAN!”
“REPEAT AFTER ME: ‘I WILL NOT SEEK REVENGE ON JOVAN. I WILL LOVE HIM, AND PROTECT HIM.’”
Yes sir… Yes… The amount of sand riding up my butt every time the waves crashed over us…
Speaking of Sand.
2) Sand gets EVERYWHERE.
No, nowhere is safe. Not the lining of your shorts, your ears, your nose, your mouth, your nails and even unmentionable places like your butt. I bet I’ll be taking a few sandy dumps from now on. But I’m not going to lie. Rolling around in the sand - though the consequences might be dire - is so fulfilling. You might feel like a powdered Muah Chee, but it’s so worth it!
When I got home today I gladly tossed everything into the washing machine and hung it out dry. I wouldn’t trade my frolicking in the sun for anything! Much thanks to the chalet mates who had fun with me too!
3) You share everything with your chalet mates for those two nights! (farts and burps included)
Let me just say, I was living with Sam, Stacey and Pauline. Any guesses for the burper and the farter? No names mentioned…. But it was tons of fun living with them. We spent the first night playing cards, apparently Sam can’t lie to save her life and Pauline is actually quite scary… hahaha
One of my favourite times of the day was breakfast where we’d gathered over the round table, talk nonsense and drink our milos (except for Sam, who only drinks Horlicks like an old uncle).
Gonna miss those times man.
4) Nicknames and cooking
I love my group! We had a decent mix of Curtin and UWA people and I think we all got on pretty well. Really the best bonding time was when we started cooking the Silky Drunken Chicken (Salty Mushroom Chicken), Imperial Spinach (Spinach Soup) and Black Pepper Beef. Delicious!
With Arnold in my group… I knew that we’d have a feast worthy enough for… oh hey! Pastor Patrick, Pastor Joyce and their three kids came! That’s how good Arnold’s cooking is. Muahahaha…
It was a lovely group, we enjoyed meals together and surviving through Tough Mudder and the Zombie Apocalypse. And of course code names were needed for times in the Zombie Apocalypse. Arnold, self-proclaimedFat Boy. Gabriel,dubbed,Little Man. And to top it all off, Kun was Hiroshima. We were just missing a Nagasaki.
The girls weren’t so bad,Yvonny was … oh dear. I forgot. I’m sorry Yvonny! Jamie wasChipmunk, Stacey wasAh Lian, Pauline wasBurps (or sometimesFarts), Samantha was dubbedMuah Cheefor her ability to roll around in the sand and come out perfectly coated. I was namedUm Chio. You know that face you make when you hold in your laughter? *sigh* Don’t ask me either.
But despite the bad code names, I think we were an awesome group, we conquered Tough Mudder, cooked a massively awesome lunch and had fun ripping into some zombies. We were very honest humans too ok. But props to Arnold. YOU DA MAN!
5) Our little spot of paradise
You can never have enough of the ‘Retreat’ part. You know, I thought this was an Easter Camp Retreat. But I feel that the first day missed that out completely. I even brought my face mask to use! Wasted.
The second day was amazing. We had a few hours to run down from our chalet to a little hillock that overlooked the ocean and the sunset. Sam, Stacey and I just stretched out, played some rocking music and lay in the sun like beached whales. Am I tanner? No. Thanks mum for the you-can’t-tan-you-burn genes. I have skin peeling at the moment. But Stacey looks as though she roasted her front while her back is still as white as snow. THAT’S WHAT YOU GET FOR NOT TURNING WHEN TANNING.
It’s little moments like this when you can’t help but be amazed at how wonderful our God-created world is. Powder white sand, a gorgeous sunset and three good friends around each other. Just another day in Paradise.
6) Praise and Worship
I’m not going to lie, the Praise and Worship sessions were a bit shaky. The mix was a bit off and the singing slightly wobbly. But when I heard that most of the singers were first timers I was amazed. First timers and already leading praise and worship for the huge camp. Did they even have enough time to practice?! If those sessions were done with out practice, I take my hats off my good sirs.
Mega praise was mega INSANE. I haven’t had a good praise session like that since I was in Secondary School, and that was just amazing. Feeling the joy and love from everyone during praise and the spirit of God come down on the place during worship. People broke down and their hearts just went out to God. You know there was a point in time when the musicians broke off, a little lost, but you could still see heads bowed down, hands raised and mouths moving in prayer. I was just reminded of how much God can touch the lives of people who just asked for it. Seek and you shall find indeed.
7) The word
On a more serious note, this camp wasn’t just about fun, sun and sea. It was really about God. And each night session, even the morning devotion taught me a little something more about God and my relationship with him.
But truly, the thing that impacted me the most was what Chee Ping said during the sharing on the last day. Cheeps was game master along with Max for the camp and doing PA as well. He worked hard for the camp and really devoted a lot of his time and energy into it. Don’t be fooled by his Ah Beng exterior! He’s really a man after God’s heart!
He said during his sharing that he had exams the next week and he was asked by his girlfriend (I hope you don’t mind me putting this up!!) not to go for the camp cause he had to study. But he said, “I told her, I’m sorry, I love God more than I love you I must go for this camp.” Sounds silly right? Putting God before anything else, but then he reminded us, put God first and he’ll take care of the rest. Surely he will bless you! That reminded me to put Jesus at the centre of my life. With God in the middle of it all, how can anything go wrong? In that moment I told myself,”Set all your troubles, your cares and worries aside, because the Lord will take care of you in all that you do as long as you walk beside him.” That I think, was the key point I took away from the camp.
Of course the other sessions were fantastic! Apostle Steven Davis came and reminded me how I should let Jesus roll away the stone of anger, rejection and bitterness away from my life and to let him in instead. James Goss shared a great testimony on his relationship with China and how God is leading him to it and we had a great prayer session after. The electives gave me practical advise on how to grow in church and I got my question on how to introduce new songs to the cell answered during the Worship elective. Devotion help me understand more about my relationship with God and how I grow closer to Him day by day.
Everyday I learnt something new and gained something spiritually, but really Chee Ping’s final sharing wrapped it all up for me and reminded me why I was in CHURCH camp. It was for God!
Camp may not be for everyone. It’s no hotel stay, no full international breakfast of 5 star beds. It’s most likely cereal and milk for breakfast, a dodgy bed where you’re given TWO bedsheets just in case of… unseen bacteria on the mattress, but you get so much out of it.
But it’s worth the dodgy mattress. You meet new friends, get closer to old ones, spend time with God and learn more about yourself.
P.S. One more thing, the food was AMAZING. I thought the team, Jon, Pei Wen and Jade had done an amazing job with the food. Really I could have eaten the BBQ all day had I not been late after my day in Paradise hahaha. Thanks to all the camp organisers!! I had so much fun :)
- First time camp attendee xoxo
The world is full of horrors
It seems as though there’s a never a shortage of bad news in the world. Makes me wonder about human decency and if it still exists.
Take a look at two of today’s headlines:
Mum consents to rape to save kids
Ukrainian girl dies after horror gang rape
There’s more, but I’m too lazy to type it up. Anyways all these news can be balanced out with equally good news that… I can’t seem to find… But I’m sure it’s there somewhere.
My question is, is it that journalists and newspapers are the ones who are at fault? Are they the ones who are bringing to light the things that they believe will bring in money? What about stories of hope? How come those stories aren’t heard of but only these daily horror stories pepper our newspapers?
Stories of heroes, of people saving lives and people doing good things, those stories need a voice, a place to be heard, somewhere where they can give people hope.
But it’s sad to say that nothing will satisfy the human desire for macabre and horror. There’s a curious desire for it that somehow news of rape and acts of brutality can satisfy. It’s sad.
I’ve heard someone say that it’s because we feel our lives are so miserable that looking at people who are in a worse condition makes us feel better about ourselves. Is that true? Because if that’s the truth, there’s something wrong with our world.
If ever…
—
Chen Zixuan.
Behind your looks of childhood lie a secret smile of knowledge.
I hope you’re in your sacred grove.
Only the good die young
You know Xuan, my clearest first impression of you was when you burst into the Broadcast class with Darren and started poking fun at me over some guy that I liked. I was really annoyed by you then.
Who’d have thought that two years down the road from Polytechnic we’d still have been friends? You grew to be a friend I really really adored.
You, Iman, Cass, Clara… You were part of my Polytechnic clique. All the gatherings that we’d have at Cass’s place, you never missed a single one. Never.
Do you remember what Cass said the last gathering we had at her house at Tanah Merah? She said, that you, me, and Iman were the only ones who never failed to turn up. Clara would sometimes be busy with church, Alvin… missing once in a while… But you never failed to be there. You never failed to entertain with your smiles, your jokes, your absent-minded face and voice.
You had such a generous and joyful spirit. I always thought that nothing could bring you down cause you’d brush it off and just move on with your life.
When I was so down… you gave me a hug and told me that’d we’d go on those speed dating things together. Laugh at all the people, and maybe you and Iman would end up bringing home so cute girls home.
Who’d have guess that you’d have broken your leg and end up lying at home in bed before we could have done that!
The day I picked up Iman from SAFTI I told him, “let’s go visit Xuan.” And three of us ended up in an impromtu jamming session. You with your kick-ass guitar skills… Sunday morning rain is falling… Steal some covers, shed some skin… And clouds are shrouding us in moments unforgettable, you twist to fit the mold that I am in…
I’m so sorry Xuan! I’m so sorry that in the seven months that I’ve been here in Australia I’ve only managed to contact you ONCE. I could have done so much more to have kept in contact with you.
Everytime I picked up the phone to call you I just kept thinking that I’d save it for when we met with the rest and I’d feed you my Shepard’s Pie.
You were the only one who really really really liked it! Cass thought it had too much potato and carbs!!!! Everytime I wanted to make it, I’d think that I’d make it only for you… And now you can’t eat it anymore and I just feel so bad…
Xuan.
I can’t be there for your wake or your funeral. But I want to. I’ll be there in spirit. I’ll always remember you. And your retarded voicemail greeting. “Zixuaaannn…” in your absent-minded voice.
It always made me laugh. You always made me laugh. You always cheered me up. You were so carefree and full of joy.
Good times Xuan. Good times. Always in my heart.
~
Aw, but they never told you the price that you pay
For things that you might have done…..
Only the good die young
That’s what i said
Only the good die young
Only the good die young.
~
That one party where I got drunk on the Vodka that YOU brought.
Gonna miss you forever Chen Zixuan.
Men who whine. Especially on their Tumblrs.
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My mother’s coming tomorrow!
Finally, after waiting for ages… My mother is coming to Australia to visit me!
Both my mother and my little sister. I wonder how much Charlotte has grown in six months! I can’t believe I’m finally going to get to see them again.
I miss them so much.
My mother - this is so cliched - is not like any other mothers. I don’t know, maybe all mothers are like her, but I like to think that my mother is special.
My mother has utter confidence in me. She makes me feel powerful and as though I can do anything I want and be great at it.
But when I fail, and I come home crying, she gives me a hug and tells me that at least I tried my best, that’s enough.
I remember when I was 15 I had entered a Singapore Youth Festival competition. I was on of the leads in my school’s production of Lord of the Flies. Of which, I’m sure most of you know, (HAHA who am I kidding. No one knows.) the characters are all boys. And the lead I played was Piggy.
I know.
Shut up.
Anyhow. We lost. We got the certificate of participation. We were especially crushed because this was our first effort at a nation-wide contest. I didn’t think that it’d be a big deal to my mother, but she hugged me, told me not to cry and brought me out to shop and have sushi at the mall.
You know what they say, retail therapy!
That day I felt the best I could ever feel, because in taking time out of her busy schedule to bring me out, my mother showed me that even the littlest of things that I did was important to her.
My mother has always given me free rein of my life. Full confidence of what I do and what I want to do. She has never judged me or tried to control me in anyway and for that I am extremely grateful.
She blames herself whenever something goes wrong in either my siblings or my life, she laments that she wished that she could have done better. But I believe she has done the best thing a parent could have done.
To let us, her children, make our own mistakes.
I believe it is important for a child to make mistakes and to learn from them. And though it sometimes takes more than a few years to learn from my mistakes - I’m still learning - I’ll get there eventually. If my mother had controlled every bit of my life, then yes, my mistakes would be hers. But my mother didn’t. She gave us gentle nudges into the right direction, and we learnt from example, but in the end, she let us make our own decisions.
Whether good or bad, I won’t find out till the end of everything. But I seem to be doing pretty decently.
I may not end up a doctor, or a lawyer, but I know I’m on my way to a good career. Most importantly, I know I’m a good person. That is what I learnt from my mother’s example. How to be kind, caring and to never judge someone.
She’s not perfect, my mother, she shops.. a lot. I picked that up from her too. She spends her money on hair and clothes and maintains herself. I try to do that too. Except I’m not drawing the kind of salary that she does. I’m as spendthrift as she is. (but being here in Perth without money, has taught me the value of it.)
I picked up a few flaws too, but mostly, I hope, her virtues.
I love my mother endlessly, and I can’t wait for her to come. I’ve made so many mistakes this semester, and I wish she had been here to pick me up and push me on again. At least, I know that in a few hours time, I’ll be able to hug my mummy and to tell her how much I love her again.
The end is near!
21 one more days. 3 more weeks.
Just a few more days and I’ll be home.
I’ll be home to my comfortable bed. My favourite toilet and in the arms of my family and friends.
What I’m really excited about however, is my little transit trip in Bali.
I’ll be landing in Bali at 11:05pm and will have to wait for the next flight at 6.20am. Now the question is, what does one do in Bali from 11 to 6?
Person A from Yahoo answers suggested wild partying along the beaches of Bali and the strip of nightclubs. “Just a few minutes away from the airport!” he declared, ending his sentence with a smiley face. :)
I wondered what types of people I might meet at the nightclubs at 11pm to 6 in the morning at the beaches of Bali.
Questionable? Dodgy? Probably. I fear for my luggage and life.
I added in an edit, “where do you think I could leave my luggage in the airport so that I could maybe explore the airport a bit? I don’t think I’m up for some clubbing with such an early flight!” - coolly distracting the readers with a reasonable excuse, just so that they don’t think I wasn’t adventurous.
Yes, insecure I was.
Person B replied, “Well I think you could leave your belongings at a counter.. But I don’t think you’ll be able to get a transit VISA. Are you traveling on Air Asia? I don’t think that there’s a transit area for you. Sorry. Good luck.”
What?! What?! NO TRANSIT AREA FOR ME JUST CAUSE I WAS ON AIR ASIA?
Oh the fear and trembling! What was I going to do? What If I was hanging around the airport bar and someone stole my 23kg worth of luggage from me?! I can’t run! I can barely go a few kilometers without my heart bursting out of my chest!
Wait. There won’t even be an airport bar! This is Bali! Indonesia! Oh god. - No disrespect meant. I just ASSUME that there won’t be a bar cause Singapore doesn’t have a bar either. -
So, I can’t get drunk, I can’t get a transit VISA and I have to lug my luggage around. I wouldn’t have taken a shower for TWO days and I’ll probably stink to high heaven.
The future looks bleak. Bali doesn’t look as fun as it did before. Help.
MUST HAVE.
Three study models
The exam craze has began and it is extremely exciting. Macdonalds and snacks (indomee for some) have become our new best friends, there is no space on the dining table and there is a tension in the air… The overwhelming feeling of… stress…
But hey, I’m not really feeling it yet. I attribute it to either being because I’m an Arts student - but that will be extremely stereotypical - or that I’m still in my first year.
Then again, amounting my lack of stress to being an effect of my first-year status is over-ridden by Weijing’s (a first-year too) amusing, but somewhat terrifying, sense of urgency. “I think I’m might fail.” He declared mid-readings this afternoon.
I think his fear of failure is slowly chipping away at my lack of care. Yet here I am! Typing out a blog post without fear of missing my deadline! Oh the shame and guilt…
This has become quite an educational process though. I look at studying with a whole new light now, new methods of studying, ways to de-stress, it’s like going back to Secondary School all over again.
Except this time I want to do well.
I have discovered, to my upmost pleasure, different methods of studying, through the people I study with:
The Stresser
Meet Weijing. He’s a sweet boy, but his powers of stress are quite terrifying. In fact, I think I’ve been affected more than once by his stress.
While he whinges and moans about not having enough time, he manages to get his work done in time, and gets reasonable distinctions. He might stress about his work, but when he’s in the zone… He’s in the zone! “I’m burning! I’m killing this!” he says in motivation of getting his work done.
Characteristics: Hunches over his work, stays in school till late, worries a lot with sudden outbursts of “crap”.
The Experienced One
Meet Jeremy. On his way to becoming a lawyer, he’s an inspiration for us all. He’s got his act together on how to run the perfect balancing act. Well, that is from my point of view.
The prime example of how-not-to-stress-before-your-exams-and-score, he maintains a healthy lifestyle while still staring at his computer. He rotates his study time with eating time (there are plenty of eating times in this household), workout time and video time. My inspiration. However, right now I’m doing more of the video time than any of the others. “Dinnertime conversation!” he says if the table gets sidetracked during study time.
Characteristics: Types quickly into the computer, sometimes bursts into song, extremely calm with sudden outbursts of “workout time!” then grabs his gloves and skipping rope. Stays up till late.
The Restless One
Meet Ian. A final year student, he’s kicking-ass with his grades and his plans to buy a fast-food franchise and make lots of money. The mess you see on the table? It belongs to him.
He’s never in the same place for long, and is at the house because he wanted a change of environment from his own house. Once in a while he rotates his studying place, outside… in the room… out in the dining table. Restless with a habit of bursting into song too. Very calm and organised, he has a timer with times allocated for various units of study.
Characteristics: Spreads his work all over the table, armed with either a giant bottle of water or a cup of green tea. Disappears from the study table once in a while.
The Arts Student
As you can see, I’m not much of a study-type. I’m more of a “what you should not be doing”. Window open to Tumblr, restlessly shaking and swinging my legs. Don’t learn from me. I’m a bad example.
It’s back to the studying table for me. Let’s hope that I’ll be able to finish about 20 lectures by the end of next week eh.
Happy Halloween!
Well I remember my favourite Halloween.
There was a slutty Office Lady, a Gothic doll, a wannabe Edward Cullen and an Angel. They queued up to head to one of Singapore’s hottest clubs, Butter Factory, and they waited. And waited. And waited.
From 12am to 2am they waited and still they didn’t get in. So they went a little insane and started taking pictures with their friends instead. Slutty harajuka girl, slutty policewoman, devil boy and slutty vampire.
Yes. There were lots of sluts. No joke, Halloween is for the sluts to come out to play.
Boy do I miss those good old times.
